


What if this is all the love I ever know?

by Sundowner



Category: SKAM (Italy)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Family, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, So be warned, after the incident with Nico, i'm sorry it's 2am here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-30 03:19:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18307121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sundowner/pseuds/Sundowner
Summary: Eleonora is dealing with her trauma after the events with Edoardo's brother. Her little family tries their best to comfort her, in their own way.Nothing is mentioned directly, but you know the drill from Skam OG so.





	What if this is all the love I ever know?

Eleonora exhaled, clearly frustrated. She was usually pretty good at math, she has been good at math since kindergarten, when the teacher beamed with happiness when little Ele with the dark pigtails rushed to her eagerly every morning to show her the little notebook with her homework. And yet, the math problem in front of her sat there, unsolved, almost mocking her. Or maybe it was not the math.

Maybe the events from the previous week were starting to take their toll on her. Both she and Edoardo had gone through all this – from the hesitant excitement of a new love to terrible doubt and misery, in addition to the nightmare encounter, only the thought of which made her clench her fists until her knuckles were white as snow and her breathing laboured as if she had the world on her shoulders. Eleonora shivered. 

Edoardo was silently watching her with a textbook laid open on his bent knee on the other side of the bed. He knew she was thinking about it, but if he let himself think about it too, he might actually kill his brother, or puke or get so drunk he doesn’t remember his own name. They had been through this and it was over. At least he kept telling himself that, trying to process this whole mess without getting an alcohol poisoning or a life sentence.

This was not about him, he kept telling himself. It was about her and how could he help her. Edoardo kept telling himself that, trying to breath. It felt like they were walking on a shaky ground which could crumble at any given moment but somehow, they had managed to make it to this moment. They were both here, despite the perpetual state of being grateful for this moment, while being scared for the very next.

“This can’t be right!” Eleonora whisper-yelled, tucking a loose curl behind her ear and looking at her notebook like it was challenging her to a staring contest. 

The crease between her eyebrows was getting deeper and deeper with each pressing second. 

“Edoardo! What are you doing? Give it back! I didn’t mark the page I was on..” 

He had taken the notebook from her without much preamble, which earned him a murderous look. 

“It’s time for a break.” His cheerful voice was a stark contrast to her demanding tone. 

“I have to study, you know that. Our final is on Monday!” She was trying to take it back, but the boy was pulling it well out of her reach. 

Trying a different tactic, she sat back down and crossed her arms, getting away from him. He barely resisted a small smile at her fiery stance, and slowly dropped the notebook at the floor, approaching her on the bed. He laid his head on her thigh and put her hand around hr waist. She didn’t try to get away from him but her gaze was still stubbornly directed at the window like he was just a mild inconvenience. 

“Eleonora.” No response. “Nora.”

He was butting her thigh with his nose, like a puppy begging for attention. 

“I love you, and I understand you about the exam, but you’re not actually getting anything done. You need a break.” 

There was a long silence, in which Edoardo kept his nose pressed to her leg, eyes closed. A deep sight erupted from her, followed by her hand reaching for his hair, her fingers burying in his messy curls almost painfully. 

“You don’t understand. I’m good at math. I have been good at math since preschool. Objectively, I even now that this shouldn’t be so complicated. And yet.. I cannot solve this problem.. “ Her voice was getting from frustrated to desperate with each word, her fingers puling at his locks unintentionally. 

“I cannot solve it, which makes me feel helpless. I’m feeling helpless, like the time after Niko.. And I start to think that maybe he broke me. Maybe.. this is me now. Not good at math. Helpless. Brok…” 

“I don’t want to hear it.” His hand had automatically tightened around her waist, and Edoardo’s voice was so quiet, yet so sure, Eleonora felt like a tiny bit of her fear is melting away.

“You are not broken. You are still strong, beautiful, stubborn.. irresistible, fiery Eleonora. You are still good at math. You are not broken, I forbid it to let this define you. This is something which has happened to you, but you are not it, and you’ll never be it. My love..” 

He sat abruptly in front of her, taking her face into his hands. Her eyes were swimming in tears and she bit her bottom lip to stop it from quivering. Edoardo smiled a little, putting his thumb below it, softly gesturing her not to worry it, as it was already bruised and puffy from the repeated action. 

“My love..” His gentle whispers caused her tears to spill silently and roll down her cheeks, strangely reminding him of their first kiss under the pouring rain.   
As if not to spook her, his lips gently touched her face, peppering her cheeks, temples, nose and forehead with such soft kisses, they felt if a butterfly was brushing her face with its wings. Eleonora had closed her eyes and was still breathing a little unevenly but her hands lay by her side, fists unclenched. 

“I love you.” Edoardo said while brushing her tears his thumbs. “And I’m so sorry this happened to you” he wanted to say. He wanted to scream from the rooftops how sorry he felt, how desperate he was to turn back time, to do anything. Instead, he swallowed his own guilt, his own tears and anger. 

Slowly, she opened her eyes. The green-blue was rimmed with red but there was something else glinting in her eyes. Determination. Fire. Eleonora. 

The next thing he knew, she was kissing him fiercely, demandingly, and Edoardo felt like a tiny part of the biggest burden in his life has been lifted from his chest. He responded with almost equal fervour, letting her lead the kiss, letting her take control. Her hands were pulling at his curls and he couldn’t resist the smile puling at the corners of his mouth.   
“Just say it. You like my hair.”

***

Filippo was pacing nervously in the small, dimly lit kitchen. He has returned home an hour ago, spotting the fancy sneakers at the door, which were bound to be Edoardo’s. But nothing could be heard from Eleonora’s room and it was obviously dark inside. 

Filippo stirred absently the pasta on the stove. He could cook, but rarely did, he either did not feel like hassling with it or was afraid someone might catch up and force him to help with dinner parties. So strategically, it was better to just steer clear. But he made a mean Penne Arrabbiata, with heaps of olives and parmesan. Just like Eleonora liked it.  
In fact, just like their mother used to make it for them both, when she returned home late after evening lectures, met with a pair of hungry eyes at the door. It was quick, it was delicious. So Filippo made it for her, in the hopes that she can be reminded she still had family which loved her and was here for her. Even if it was only him. 

Putting his one hand at the door, he used the door to crack it slightly open. The light from the hallway seeped into Eleonora‘s room and Filippo saw two sleeping figures on her bed. Eleonora was facing the door, her hand outstretched on the bed, her hair messy but her face was peaceful. The boyfriend, Filippo thought exasperatedly, had his face buried in her hair, his fingers wrapped protectively around her. 

Filippo sat there, wondering what to do, watching them sleep wrapped around each other. Suddenly, Eleonora stirred and slowly opened her eyes, blinking at the light. 

“Filo.” It took her a few seconds to register his presence and he smiled at her grogginess. 

“Hey, sleeping beauty.” He was kneeling beside her bed, catching her outstretched hand in his. 

“What time is it?” She was asking, a little worried, yet with no clear intention of leaving the cocoon of the warm embrace. 

“Time for dinner. Would you and your slightly embracing boyfriend care to join me for what one might call, an exceptional Penne Arrabbiata?” Filo let a small laugh at the way Eleonora’s eyes went wide. 

“I heard that by the way.” Edoardo’s voice was muffled from her hair, his hand pressing Eleonora to him even more firmly to show them he was awake. 

“Then you must try the most delicious pasta ever.” Eleonora was smiling broadly and trying to get away from his grip. 

“This better be worth it.” Edoardo let her go, lifting his head from the pillow. 

“Tell your boyfriend not to doubt my genius. Especially when Pasta Arrabbiata is involved.” Filippo has turned to look him in the eyes.  
Without words, he was trying to express all the love and the feeling of protectiveness over his little sister, awaiting a silent answer for the unvoiced question - on which line of their little family he stood. 

To which Edoardo only nodded, taking Eleonora’s hand in his.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated. 
> 
> *Penne Arrabbiata is a super simple pasta with chillis, olives and tomatoes(Google the recipe if you're curios).


End file.
